Should I Hire a Private Investigator to Know if My Spouse Is Cheating?

People usually say that it’s wiser to talk directly to a spouse about issues when they arise. What people don’t realize is that asking your spouse if they’re cheating often makes it even more difficult to discover the truth. A confronted spouse often feels defensive and will look for even better ways to hide infidelity. Most experts agree that if your spouse cheats on you, the best way to confirm it is to hire a private investigator. These are professionals who are trained in surveilling and gathering information, and they are the best way to confirm infidelity.

However,  while effective, hiring a private investigator doesn’t come without its disadvantages. Although the cons are few, the repercussions are serious. 

Read on if you’re greatly considering this decision.

Hiring a Private Investigator to Confirm Infidelity: Advantages and Tips

Private investigators are typically employed as detectives or undercover agents to gather and collect information that is vital to their clients. One of the most crucial duties of private investigators is surveillance, which often involves using GPS trackers or personally following the target without them being aware in order to see where they go and know what they are doing.

Private investigators are licensed by the state to gather information and engage in these activities. If the potential for legal proceedings exists in your situation, hiring a private investigator can help minimize your risk of being litigated. Not only that, but in most cases, PIs are even allowed to testify on your behalf. Their statements will be considered less biased and more credible because of their lack of emotional involvement.

Here’s what you should know before getting yourself one.

Are you ready?

Irish Mirror

Do make sure to hire a private investigator only if you are truly ready to know the truth. Confirming a partner’s infidelity will have major repercussions on your life and the lives of everyone involved, including your children.

Gather initial evidence.

Before you hire an investigator, doing some snooping on your own is a wise option. Aside from ensuring that you do need an investigator, conducting your own investigation can also help reduce the costs of hiring a PI because of the information you can provide. Be warned, though. In most states, individual privacy is protected, even from concerned family members. If you break the law and your marriage ends badly, your spouse can take you to court for your illegal actions. Check this article out to know when it’s okay to spy on your spouse.

Discuss with your lawyer.

If you are serious about hiring a private investigator, it is important that you seek legal counsel about it beforehand. The lawyer will advise you whether your situation would benefit from hiring a PI to get more details. Marital disputes are more often than not concerned with legal issues, so having advice from a lawyer can help limit your exposure. Many attorneys also work with private investigators and may be able to recommend a PI that they have worked with or have heard is reputable. They can also give you tips on how to minimize your costs and tell you your limits if you’re planning to gather your own proof.

Disadvantages of Hiring a Private Investigator

There will be some people who will advise you against getting yourself a PI. And their reasons are understandable. Here’s what you should consider:


The investigation is over, and you were wrong about your spouse. You pay the private investigator’s fee, go on with your life, and your spouse never knows about it. You’ll have to live with the guilt that you failed to trust them and that you strongly accused them of something they never did, which led you to shell out a lot of money.


Private investigation is a highly expensive service. It can easily cost $5,000 or more for a reasonable investigation, and the money does not come with any guarantee. Is it worth the fee when it’s completely possible that you’ll be mistaken about your suspicions?

Gravely offends spouse

Imagine how things would turn out if your suspicions were proven wrong by the investigator, and your innocent spouse later found out that you once went out of your way to hire a private investigator to snoop on them. A rift in your marriage may occur, and that takes months, years, perhaps even a lifetime to overcome.

Won’t save the marriage

If you were really proven right about your spouse cheating, what would you do then? Consider that very carefully. Would you stay, or are you doing this to file a divorce? If you intend to divorce your spouse once you prove that they are unfaithful, hire the investigator because you will not care how angry they become once they find out that they’ve been spied on. But if you love your spouse and want your marriage to survive even if they have strayed, you’d rather see a marriage counselor or therapist.

Take your time to decide.


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