The Deal Breakers: Why People Get Divorced

Reasons People Get Divorced

People fall in love, and when they do, all they hope for is for that love to last forever. Then we all wait for that moment when we’re convinced enough that that person is the one we want to grow old with. And when that comes, we tie the knot.

The road to marriage can be tough, but what’s even tougher is maintaining that marriage. It takes more than just love to stay together. There’s a lot to keeping a relationship healthy and strong than I love you’s and morning kisses. It’s more complicated than it sounds and looks, and a lot of people don’t know that or are just not ready for it, that’s why a considerable number of marriages end in divorce.

In the United States alone, 50 percent of marriages end in divorce, a number that’s quite alarming, if you think about it. As to why, well, that’s a discussion that’s worth taking part in.

5 Familiar Reasons People Get Divorced

 

There are many reasons people get divorced. Let’s talk about some of them.

1. Unfaithfulness

Nothing screams a sad ending louder than cheating. Supporting this is a study about divorce conducted by the University of Denver Psychology Department. After interviewing 52 divorcees, the group found out that infidelity is one of the most cited contributing factors to divorce.

This should not really come as a surprise. Extra-marital affairs ruin a marriage worse than any issue can. There are many reasons married people cheat, some seek excitement while there are those who cheat because they’ve fallen out of love. Either way, when their partner cheats, a person stops trusting not just their spouse but the relationship as a whole. So most choose to end it before the whole time together becomes more toxic and emotionally damaging.

It is worth noting, though, that not all affairs last and infidelity does not always lead to divorce. Some use it as a reminder to pay more attention to their partner and create an atmosphere of honesty in the relationship.

2. Financial issues

You know why most marriage experts will tell you to know each other’s money before getting married? It’s because it is one of the main reasons people get divorced. Sometimes, it’s not even the lack of it, it’s the difference in the way the couple spends their money. If one is a saver and the other a saver, arguments often ensue.

3. Lack of commitment

In the same study conducted by the Denver University, the results have it that if the couple did not divorce because of infidelity, they separate because the urge to commit to the relationship has eroded.

Fear or lack of commitment is what makes romantic relationships unsustainable. Fear of it hinders you from actually committing to the relationship, and lack of it weakens the once-blissful romance, which almost always leaves you no reason to continue being together.

4. Failure to communicate

Communication is very important in relationships. It does not mean you have to share every single thing about how your day went, but it pays to sit down and chat about how you’ve been feeling, what you’ve been thinking, over a cup of tea.

No relationship is ever safe from problems, but if these little issues are never talked about because both parties refuse to take the time to discuss things that matter, these problems won’t be fixed. And if they’re not addressed, ending things is the only sensible way out. The conclusion is, lack of communication often leads to more pressing issues, making it one of the most common reasons people get divorced.

5. Unmet expectations

When we get into a relationship, all we want is for it to be perfect. We see almost every romance film ends happily, with the couple enjoying a hug and exchanging I love you’s, and we tell ourselves, “That’s the kind of relationship I want.” We hope for too much that we end up setting the bars too high. And when we actually get there, we carry those expectations and standards with us only to find out that reality is way different.

Unmet expectations are the least talked-about yet one of the major reasons people get divorced. “It’s the cause of all heartache,” as William Shakespeare once said. And it’s the kind of disappointment that does not come suddenly. Your spouse fails to meet one expectation after another until it gets bigger. Next thing you know, it has doomed your relationship.

When talking about the reasons for divorce, the first thing that comes to our mind is cheating and infidelity. While it’s true that it’s the culprit behind most divorces, it’s not the only one. Anything can lead you to you to the table filled with papers calling for you to sign them. What’s important, though, is that the moment you feel like something’s off, spare a significant amount of time to talk with your spouse. Don’t leave any issue unattended. Talk, hear each other’s side, just give yourselves and your relationship a chance.

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Amanda Thomas

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